Each one should test their own actions. Then they can take pride in themselves alone, without comparing themselves to someone else, for each one should carry their own load. Galatians 6:4-5
It’s a new morning and there is fresh hope for a great day! I’m bound and determined to make sure things go smoothly today. Everyone is going to stay on time, have a good attitude, and enjoy learning. Everybody is up and moving…barely, but it’s a start right? Time starts sneaking past us and I begin giving out orders like a drill sergeant. I’m making sure beds are made, breakfast is finished, clothing is on, teeth are brushed, and faces are washed. Forty minutes is surely enough time to get this all done with time to spare, so why are we rushing again? It’s time for our walk, and we aren’t ready! In the place of calmness and peace, I find confusion. Everyone’s running around as if it is Black Friday and their favorite item is selling out fast. With everyone excited, the pup picks up on that energy and decides there must be a reason for this craziness, so he better join the club. My head is spinning and it isn’t even 6:30 yet! Is it just us or does this sound familiar?
What are we doing wrong? I think I can tell you. We just need to calm down, make it clear what we expect (consequences if needed), and relax a little. We take ourselves and our plans way too seriously sometimes. It isn’t that we should expect to be disobeyed; it’s that we don’t have fun while making sure things get accomplished, and we’re projecting a tenseness that simple is contagious. We set the mood for our families, so why do we choose chaotic? Granted, kids can go from comatose to chaotic in no time flat, but we should be smart enough to rein it in. Let’s get them a little more motivated from the beginning, and then turn their energy into productivity. When I’m stepping out that door, I want to hear giggles again instead of sighs! I want to see a calm pup instead of one that is overwhelmed!
I’m going to implement a new strategy. If you find yourself overwhelmed and want to join me, here are my new ways to help morning chaos:
- Make sure that what you expect is realistic. Consider the age and time frame.
- Be clear on what needs to be accomplished. A list for the kids is essential! (I guarantee they’ll find a loophole if it isn’t on paper…I’m telling you I think my boys practice to be lawyers.)
- Have a deadline. They need to know every day when you expect the list to be accomplished. Set a timer or alarm so there aren’t any questions about that.
- Put a bell out, and the first one to ring it before the timer goes off (with the list all checked off and done in a manner you’ve discussed) gets a reward. It could be an extra few minutes watching TV, getting out of a chore that evening, choosing a game, or whatever their currency is.
- Let them know what their punishment is if that bell isn’t rung before the timer or alarm goes off. It could be going to bed a few minutes early, having to do the chore of the one who got there on time, or even not getting to play the game that was chosen.
- The dog has to be calm before going out…period.
- Stay relaxed. They can’t get mad at you, because you aren’t the bad guy. If they didn’t make it by the set time, they are choosing the punishment. No getting over-emotional needed.
- Praise them!
Today, test your actions to make sure it will get you the right reactions. Give children and teenagers a chance to carry their own load while you support and cheer them on! It will raise their confidence and give them a sense of accomplishment.
Jason Olson, while talking about being a successful leader, said, “Great leadership isn’t about bossing people around; it’s about inspiring and guiding people towards a common goal for everyone’s benefit. Build your team up, give them credit for their work, praise their efforts and reward them when they succeed.” What more important team do we have than our family? It’s time for us to be great leaders!