Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight. 1 Peter 3:3-4
I’m going to try to be very gentle about a touchy subject today. It isn’t politics, it isn’t money, and it isn’t even what religious denomination you are…it’s clothing. Sounds funny when I put it like that, but this issue can be quite the hot topic in church! It has even been the subject of many Sunday morning conversations in my house with one of the guys. It could’ve been any of them; it just depended on the day. The talk would go something like this:
Me: Are you wearing that to church? (Obviously if they were dressed and ready to go to church, they were planning on wearing what they had on to church. Yet, it still came out of my mouth.)
Male: Yep.
Me: Hmm. Do you think that’s appropriate? (What was I…passive aggressive all of a sudden?)
Male: Yep. (Eyes might drift down as if they forgot what they were wearing.)
Me: I think you have a nicer shirt to wear. (I obviously was making this drag out way too long. Just say what I had to say already!)
Male: Nah.
Me: Would you please change into a nicer shirt? (Why didn’t I just say that from the beginning?)
Male: Why? (Even though we went through this same conversation quite a few times, I was being asked the same question again.)
Me: Respect. (If they wanted to impress someone, they would be strutting around in their best shirt. Who better to dress up for than God?)
Male: Fine, but God looks at my heart, not my clothes. (Got me there.)
As 1 Peter tells us, these guys were right about what God sees. I realized I would rather have their inner self be shining than their shoes or clothes. They were going to church with me and praising God, but I wasn’t focusing on that. I was being critical of what was on the outside instead of being thankful for their hearts.
Does that mean they should wear whatever they want to church? No, because there are other people involved. We can say that we shouldn’t worry about what other people think and that we can’t please everyone, and that would be true to an extent, but we never want to be a distraction for other worshipers. This is where we have to limit our freedom so we don’t offend others. I realize that we can’t make everyone happy all the time, but we can do our part while letting God do His. There’s a happy medium! Do what you can with what you have. These guys can be neat, clean, and look respectable by wearing good jeans and a nice shirt. Compromise!
The character trait for today is Deference-limiting my freedom so I do not offend the tastes of those around me (definition from characterfirst.com).
My boys wouldn’t say hello in the same way to their grandparents as they might a buddy…that’s deference. I’m sure they wouldn’t have the same manners in front of a group of guys as they have in front of me…that’s deference and I’m sure glad for it!
Today, appreciate the actions of someone showing deference to you instead of focusing on those that are offending you. If you’re around people, be aware of how your actions or words effect them. Remember to make sure that your inner self is shining brighter than anything on the outside!
