Month: January 2017

Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall. Proverbs 16:18

But he gives us more grace. That is why Scripture says: “God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble.” James 4:6

“Why can’t my dog be as well behaved as yours? Look how he’s so focused on you! He’s such beautiful dog.” These are a few of the reactions I’ve received when having my pup out and about. At that point, I started to feel a little pride in our hard work because it was starting to pay off. Yeah, that pat on the back was kinda nice. We went by another dog that was out of control and causing a raucous, and my dog glanced over in a haughty demeanor as if saying, “You uncivilized beast.”

This is about the time when I shook myself out of dreamland and step into reality because I know that the next second I could be asking my dog why in the world he did what he did and ask what he was thinking. Dogs surely aren’t robots and they’re going to make mistakes, and I can pretty much guarantee it’ll be at the most inopportune time. It’ll also show our weakness as their owners. Let me tell you, it’s a great way to stay humble.

The character trait for today is Humility-acknowledging that achievement results from the investment of others in my life (definition from characterfirst.com).

To begin with, I can’t even take the credit for my dog’s behavior. Ok, it’s on me if I can’t control him, but all of his achievements are the results of others. We’ve gone through many classes and books on the subject of dog behavior that have taught us a tremendous amount.

When he is well behaved, God gets most of the credit. I just assume He’s answering the many hundreds of prayers I’ve sent His way to help my dog be calm, obedient, and stable…and not do anything stupid, please not to let him do anything stupid!

Actually, God connected us with someone that only could be His doing. It’s a long story, but we’ve had a brilliant trainer working with us for months now. He’s in a different country, but he’s only a phone call away! He’s patient, gives great advice, leads me to the right path, and never tires of my MANY questions. Well, maybe he does, but is kind enough not to show it. He’s walked me through really trying times and talked me down from complete hysteria in order to handle situations in a calm, controlled way.

So really, when the pup does well, I know it was from all the investment into his training from so many. It makes me nervous when I realize I’m starting to feel prideful of his behavior because I always learn a lesson on humility soon after.

 

Let me share something I found online by Lawrence Wilson:

Here are seven things you can do nearly every day to practice humility.

1. Avoid taking credit. This goes beyond saying, “Aw shucks,” to deflect a compliment. Practice the discipline of secrecy by keeping one of your achievements from being known to others. That means not saying things like, “I fixed the copier, you can thank me later.”
2. Praise others. Pride makes us envious or resentful of another’s talents. The surest way to break that is to compliment others. Don’t pass up an opportunity.
3. Help others succeed. Few things attack the ego quite as much as helping others succeed. Pride hoards knowledge and resources; humility shares them.
4. Admit your mistakes. Ugh. Nobody likes doing this, but the quicker you’re willing to say “I was wrong” the closer you are to humility.
5. Learn from others. This is another way to appreciate the value of others. When you acknowledge that they have advanced beyond you, you humble yourself.
6. Go last. At a restaurant, at family dinner, in line at Wal-Mart, let someone else go first. It’ll do you good.
7. Serve someone. We instinctively resist serving because we believe there is a direct relationship between being served and being important. Jesus turned that idea on its head. Bring your spouse a cup of tea, run an errand for a friend, give away some money.

The only way to be humble is to be humbled. Though that is difficult to accept, you can do it. Andrew Murray wrote, “The danger of pride is greater and nearer than we think, and the grace for humility too.”

 

Today, celebrate in your successes, but remember all those who invested in your life for you to see the results you’re getting. Stay humble by practicing some of the advice from Lawrence Wilson!

Offer hospitality to one another without grumbling. 1 Peter 4:9

I spent many Saturday nights staying over at my grandparents’ house. We’d get up in the morning and head out to the patio to have our cereal in the early morning sunshine still dressed in our pajamas. Then, Grandpa would listen to a preacher on the television while we were upstairs getting ready. When it started getting close to when he wanted to get out the door, he’d begin announcing the time…every…few…minutes! Those were the best memories.

That was just the beginning of what would be a wonderful day. After Grandpa got Grandma, my sister, and me corralled out the door and we got filled up with great singing and a refreshing message, it was time to stroll back to their house where the rest of the family would gather.

It was only mid-morning, but the smell of food would greet us as we walked in the door. Grandma had pasta or some other yummy food just waiting for us. She’d have all the salads made and sitting in the fridge with our names on them. Yes, she made a separate salad to suit each person’s taste. Can you imagine? You couldn’t talk her out of it either. It was her way of showing love, and we felt it every time we passed out those special, individual bowls.

I don’t know how many times people would drop in to visit and share a coffee, iced tea, or a meal. Anyone was welcome and many have enjoyed passing time at my grandparents’ house. They showed so much hospitality that you felt like the honored guest. There were many Sundays that I’d even have a friend with me. My friends enjoyed being there as much as I did, and they surely wouldn’t leave hungry! When my hubby started joining us, he was sooo spoiled. He loved it!

There was always laughter, noise, and full stomachs. I don’t remember my grandparents ever telling us to calm down or lower the volume. Well, my aunt would start singing the Amen chorus after grace (the aunt that couldn’t sing), and Grandpa would have to tell her that there was no singing at the table!

It was common to find several people passed out all around the living room and dining room floor for an afternoon nap between all the fun. That’s how comfortable we always felt there. The fun we had playing games and eating even more couldn’t be beat. Those were great times!

The character trait for today is Hospitality-cheerfully sharing food, shelter, and friendship with others (definition from characterfirst.com).

I don’t see as much of those gatherings happening with people anymore. I try to keep some of those traditions alive with my children hoping that they just might want to stop by on those Sunday afternoons after they’ve moved out and started their own families. Sundays are important to us, and I don’t like to see groups schedule meetings and games on those precious days. I even like to still see the afternoon naps take place!

I challenge you to invite someone over soon. Provide some food, a comfy afternoon, and lots of laughter. Don’t grumble about having to clean the house or worry about having everything perfect. I guarantee you that isn’t what’s remembered. The hospitality is what’s remembered.

Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves. Romans 12:10

So God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them. Genesis 1:27

Every year, on November 11^th, my boys march in a Veterans’ Day Parade. The scout group that they’re active in always participates in the local celebration. Unfortunately, it was amazing to realize how many children didn’t really know why they were there (besides to be in a parade) or the significance of that day.

My hubby studied with his group so they recognized the importance of showing honor to the veterans. Then, the group passed out several cards to the veterans they met that day. It was great for the children to honor someone by telling them thanks, shaking their hand, and handing them a card.

The character trait for today is Honor-respecting others because of their worth as human beings (definition from characterfirst.com).

The boys started to realize how people you pass on the street, in the store, or even those who live next door have a story. They might not be veterans, but each person has their very own story to tell. Each and every one of us was created in God’s image. If we want to honor God, what better way than to honor each other? How do we honor others? Showing respect is a great first step.

Here are some ideas from goodcharacter.com for children that would do us well to remember:

• Don’t insult people or make fun of them.
• Listen to others when they speak.
• Value other people’s opinions.
• Be considerate of people’s likes and dislikes.
• Don’t mock or tease people.
• Don’t talk about people behind their backs.
• Be sensitive to other people’s feelings.
• Don’t pressure someone to do something he or she doesn’t want to do.

Here’s some more of what goodcharacter.com had to say:  We live in a diverse nation made up of many different cultures, languages, races, and backgrounds. That kind of variety can make all our lives a lot more fun and interesting, but only if we get along with each other. And to do that we have to respect each other. In addition to the list above, here are some ways we can respect people who are different from us.

• Try to learn something from the other person.
• Never stereotype people.
• Show interest and appreciation for other people’s cultures and backgrounds.
• Don’t go along with prejudices and racist attitudes.

Brilliant!  So, the next time you’re around someone, really look at them. Not just the outside, but the inside.  No matter if they seem wonderful or rather rude, recognize they were made in God’s image. They have a story. Be kind. Do it for God. Seriously, just do it, and teach it to the next generation too! It will be a big step forward in our society.

One of them, when he saw he was healed, came back, praising God in a loud voice. Luke 17:15

I remember teaching the boys gratitude from the time they were little. Anytime they were given a drink, handed a toy, received a gift, or got help, they had to respond with a “thank you”. “Please” and “thank you” were looked upon as the magic words. They were the words that would open doors for my little guys when they were young.

As they got older, we had a game we used to play to further show appreciation. I would take brown paper bags and put everyday items in them. These were to represent gifts given to them, and it would help them practice their responses. Let me tell you, these presents could get pretty bizarre and they prepared them for certain occasions! The point was, it didn’t matter what the actual gift was, if it was given with a kind and thoughtful heart, it was special to us.

The character trait for today is Gratefulness-letting others know by my words and actions how they have benefited my life (definition from characterfirst.com).

I wanted to show the veterinarian’s office how much I appreciated their kindness as I was going through figuring out our dog’s food allergies, so for Christmas I took them in some chocolates. I didn’t think much of it, but I received the kindest card from all of them. It really does mean something to others when they know you appreciate them.  So, remember to be grateful.  Better yet, when someone goes above and beyond, let their boss know!

I talked about doors opening for the little guys when they were young, but it’s amazing how doors are still being open in the present, and how they’ll be in the future by those simple words that mean so much. Manners will take a young man far in life. I believe that having gratitude is what will make all of us move forward and not be stagnant.

Today, show someone you’re grateful for something they did for you.  Send out a note, make a phone call, or even take a little gift of appreciation to them. You never know how you’ll make an impact on someone’s life with that gesture.

Also, please remember to thank God often because we’re always receiving his grace. Yet, too often we are like the many lepers who run off accepting the blessings received without turning back to say, “I appreciate it.”  Only one remembered to be grateful. Be that one today!

I’ve challenged my boys to start writing down three things they’re grateful for every day. Also, on their bathroom mirror it says, “I’m thankful for…” This reminds them each time they’re washing their hands to name three things their thankful for. It’ll start a heart of gratitude! You just might want to try it.

A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. Proverbs 15:1

There’s a bit of a cold that has been running rampant in our house for the past week. I don’t know about you, but tolerance tends to be lower and attitudes take a nosedive when sickness strikes. It’s been much better than ever before because of positivity that’s been in place within our house since the beginning of the year. Still, during the times that are more difficult, we need to be very careful in what we say and how we sound so that we don’t offend others. Simply, we have to be gentler.

The character trait for today is Gentleness-showing consideration and personal concern for others (definition from characterfirst.com).

Yesterday, the hubby wasn’t going out after work because he felt miserable, and the oldest needed a book picked up from the library. I figured I’d run out as soon as he got home, so when I got the call he was leaving work, I waited twenty minutes and put on my coat. Now, he was going to the store, but that usually only adds about five minutes onto his time. I couldn’t image what could’ve happened when he came twenty minutes later with the driver’s door wide open, I didn’t know what to think!

I met him outside and totally screwed up. I didn’t welcome him home and I didn’t say how sorry I was that he was feeling terrible. I immediately asked, “What took so long?” Also, I was wandering about the whole door situation, but that’s a discussion for another time. Apparently he went to a store that took longer to get to in order to buy orange juice. He seemed a bit angry and frustrated. What just happened?

Three words keep coming to mind as I’m writing this today…tone of voice. Sometimes it isn’t about what’s being said, it’s how it’s said. Was I sweet and his soft place when he came home or was I demanding answers as soon as he pulled in?

Dr. Leman wrote, “A man needs to feel your respect in order to love you the way you want to be loved. If he doesn’t feel your respect, he won’t climb out of his turtle shell to risk loving you because he might get hurt.” Did he feel disrespected?

I needed to ask myself if he felt like I was a loving partner or a boss demanding a response. I think we know the answer to that, even if it wasn’t what I meant. I was just trying to get to the library, but I hurt his feelings. Remember…sickness…sensitive! He needed that extra love, even if I held my breath the whole time so I wouldn’t be sucking in his germs! Instead, I’m jumping in the vehicle while firing off questions. I shouldn’t have done that even if he wasn’t sick!

Today, ask yourself if what and how you are saying something is helping you reach a goal of making your relationships stronger. If it isn’t, don’t even let the words out. Don’t be harsh, but be gentle. Show consideration for those who cross your path. If they’re sick, be extra careful!

A generous person will prosper; whoever refreshes others will be refreshed. Proverbs 11:25

Each of you should give what you have decided in your heart to give, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver. 2 Corinthians 9:7

Do not withhold good from those to whom it is due, when it is in your power to act. Proverbs 3:27

The boys have been working on personal management skills. They’ve been learning these real world skills by getting their “paycheck” every week through an allowance. They have certain “bills” they have to pay (weekly activity dues), donations they make, money they put aside for savings, money they are free to spend, and they even keep emergency money for something that comes up unexpectantly.

I’ve seen something that I’ve been able to learn from. They tuck away their money into the donation envelopes, and when the time comes, they excitedly give their money to help others. They will even make suggestions where we can all donate to. They’re involved in giving, and I’ve watched their generosity grow. I’ve certainly seen them go into their spending money to give more than they set aside many times.

The character trait for today is Generosity-carefully managing my resources so I can freely give to those in need (definition from characterfirst.com).

In one of her books, Brooke St. James said that we shouldn’t worry too much about whether or not the person deserves good, and just do our best to act when we’re capable of it. Also, we think we’re doing something for someone else, and we end up being the ones who are blessed by it. This is so true!

Today, listen to where God wants you to give in His name, and do so generously and with excitement. Don’t worry about if they “deserve” it, just act! You’re faithfulness in listening and giving will be rewarded.

as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us. Psalm 103:12

For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins. Matthew 6:14-15

We were at my grandma’s house one year when she was taking down her fall decorations. She had several beautiful pumpkins she had painted many years before that needed to be taken to the attic. My aunt and I were lugging the box up when the unthinkable happened. Yep, we dropped them and they broke. We felt terrible and frankly, so did my grandma. She didn’t yell or get mad, but we knew she was upset. Even though we knew she was disappointed, we also knew that she would forgive us, and she did without hesitation! My aunt and I have brought it back up many times, but not her. When she forgave us, she forgave as God does…as far as the east is from the west.

My oldest was doing an essay for literature when he was amazed to read Matthew 6:14-15. Forgiveness is often taught here, and I’m sure he has heard those verses before, but this time it really hit him. He learned how important it was for you to forgive others. We can’t expect God to do something for us that we aren’t willing to do. It was quite a moment and made me take another look at those verses too.

The character trait for today is Forgiveness-clearing the record of those who have wronged me and not holding a grudge (definition from characterfirst.com).

It’s unbelievable how we can’t move forward when we don’t forgive. It’s not hurting the other person near as much as it’s hurting ourselves. In one of Brooke St. James’s books it talked about how you have to forgive others. She said that unforgiveness is like drinking rat poison and waiting for the rat to die. You’re wishing harm, or at least justice, on the person who wrongs you, but all that’s happening is you’re stuck remembering it. You’re the one drinking the poison.

I remember learning how forgiving someone wasn’t saying what they did was ok. What it was doing was allowing you to be free by handing over the situation to someone much bigger and more capable of dealing with it. God. He can’t deal with things that we’re gripping with both hands. We’re so busy holding onto that unforgiveness that we have no hands to catch His blessings.

I’ll guarantee you we aren’t hurting the one we feel has wronged us. They probably aren’t even thinking about it. We’re hurting ourselves. We’re allowing that person that we were mad at control us. We’re drinking the rat poison! Once it’s gone from our system we can feel our peace and joy come back. We may even restore a relationship.

Mahatma Gandhi said, “The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.” I know you’re strong and with God’s help you can forgive anyone. The reward is much too great to miss out on…freedom, blessings, peace, joy…

Today, put into God’s hands what you’ve been holding onto. It opens them for His blessings. One more thing, have you forgiven yourself? That’s part of it. Are you holding onto something that you’re ashamed of? Your hands still aren’t free if you are. God’s like Grandma. He forgives quickly once we repent.  Plus, our transgressions are removed as far as the east is from the west. He doesn’t bring them back up like we do. If you haven’t already, forgive yourself so you can move forward.

Blessed are those who listen to me, watching daily at my doors, waiting at my doorway. Proverbs 8:34

My hubby was given the opportunity to go to Gettysburg, PA for a leadership seminar. We had been homeschooling, and the boys and I were invited to go along. What an awesome chance it was to explore and learn about a significant time in U.S. history! Of course we should’ve jumped at the chance to go.

I admit that the thought ran through my head that it would be different than we normally learn. It wasn’t part of the plan. We sit at a desk, follow a curriculum, have each subject taught separately, and do the pages in the workbooks. I was actually thinking that they may lessen their education by immersing themselves in history through walking those same paths that so many did so many years ago. Why? Because that wasn’t how we always did it. It wasn’t how everyone else was learning.

I learned some very important realities that trip. Education is about flexibility. Education is about taking hold of the opportunities to learn from experiencing. It’s about connecting one subject with another. It’s about excitement and growth.

We learned so much about important people that were there in Gettysburg. Then, we stood where they stood. We learned about the soldiers and how they would have felt. We did two trails; one confederate and one union. Education is about feeling and not just reading. We even visited the Eisenhower farm. We learned from people who were passionate and knowledgeable about that particular time in history.

The boys remembered so much more from seeing with their own eyes rather than looking at a picture in a book. It caused a connection with emotions being stirred up. Something as simple as going to a wax museum and looking at the presidents while learning some facts about them made it stick in their heads. This is what flexibility did for us. It unleashed God’s plans and blessings. It opened our eyes to a better way of learning.

If a child can’t learn the way we teach, maybe we should teach the way they learn.  -Ignacio Estrada

Education is the ability to listen to almost anything without losing your temper or your self-confidence.  -Robert Frost

The character trait for today is Flexibility-willingness to change plans or ideas without getting upset (definition from characterfirst.com).

In what area of your life are you missing out because you’re unwilling to change? When you don’t want to do something new, do you ever hear yourself say, “It’s how it has always been done. Don’t change something that isn’t broken.” Does it make you shake your head when someone else says it? Something doesn’t always have to be broken in order to make it better. Are we getting in God’s way of making it better? Is the system the cause of people being stuck?

Today, listen to others’ ideas and be open to a new way. God just might be showing you that you can fix something even if you didn’t know it was broken.

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. Romans 8:28

Last Saturday was one of those days that didn’t need to be crazy, but my attitude started to make it that way. God really did provide a solution to everything, but I had a reverted back to my old ways a couple of times wanting things to follow my plan.

There was a dish I needed to make for a banquet we were going to. I was already behind and didn’t have all the ingredients. My hubby was kind enough to run to the grocery store to get me what I needed on his lunch break the day before. As I was setting the ingredients on the counter that morning, I couldn’t find the mushrooms. They were used the night before!

Could we just run to the store? Yep! Did I still have time? Yep! Did I stay in the right frame of mind? Nope. I couldn’t see us running to the store again when we were just there. Pretty silly…it needed to be done, and we were able to do it. God had a HUGE lesson in store for me.

The hubby went to get the mushrooms and came back from the store with a story to tell. He ran into someone who was in great need. Her husband was laid-off and there wasn’t enough money in her account. Her kids needed to eat and her card was being declined. God put my hubby there at the exact right time where he could be God’s hands. There was a reason we didn’t have those mushrooms for the dish, but I didn’t think of that at the time.

Instead of getting excited to see what God had planned when things weren’t going according to my plan, I had a bad attitude. I complained, yet God still used us to do the exact thing we ask of Him…show us how to give, how to help, how to bless, and how to be His hands here on earth. I could’ve screwed it all up by not going with the flow, relaxing, and letting God take care of it. I learned so much over the past month and was ashamed at not seeing the positive in the situation. Not showing faith.

The character trait for today is Faith-confidence that actions rooted in good character will yield the best outcome, even when I cannot see how (definition from characterfirst.com).

I stopped showing gratitude in that situation. I should’ve been saying thanks that we can get the ingredients, thanks that we have time, thanks that my hubby came home early. See, God had every detailed planned. All I needed to do was have gratitude in what I did have and keep confident that God would work the rest out. I couldn’t see how this could be a good thing, but that’s the point…I’m not God. I learned a very important lesson that I need to do what I can with thankfulness and a good attitude, and let God do the rest.

He drove His point home that night. Something new I’ve been doing is writing down what I think God might be telling me in my prayer time every morning. I’m still learning to listen to His voice. When I settled into bed that evening, I pulled out what I wrote earlier in the morning. I got goose bumps. It was something I didn’t even remember by 11:00 a.m. It said, “Give in the name of Jesus Christ.” He even told me, but I still wasn’t searching for what He gave me a heads-up on.

Today, don’t get caught up in the stuff that won’t matter five years from now or even next week. Keep a good attitude, and know that God will work everything out for the good of those who love Him! I guarantee He has a plan that is bigger and greater than yours.

Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters, Colossians 3:23

My boys will often play a DVD of German flashcards in the vehicle while we run errands. The hubby is constantly saying to give the remote control back to us before getting out so that it doesn’t fall out of the car. They tend to put it in the cup holder on the door where it isn’t very secure; there’s a concern that the slightest bump could cause it to drop to the ground when they’re getting out.

I was walking past the vehicle last week when something caught my eye. There was a black rectangle in the snow. Sure enough, it was the remote. In the snow. In the cold. All night long. I picked it up, took it inside, pulled out the batteries, dried it out, and let it sit. Hoping it wasn’t ruined. Hoping it was a temporary setback. Hoping it would warm-up!

It made me think of how our emotions can be pretty unstable just like that remote control. We let something that gave us such joy at one time become mundane. We rely on those unreliable emotions to determine if there is still joy in the task we’re doing. We become like the remote control wobbling around in the cup holder.

Let’s take a look at getting our first home. What joy we had to sweep our own floors, possibly with our brand new sweeper! Look how nice our house looked. Did you see what that sweeper can do? Let’s not forget about the first time we could do the laundry in our very own homes! How exciting! What about that new feather duster we got? Did you see what it can pick-up?

Ok, now think about those same tasks a year later, a month later, come on…really?…a week later! What happened to the enthusiasm? Not only has the joy waned, the complaining starts. It sounds to me like the joy wasn’t solidly in place, just like the remote control. Let’s look back…what happened to the remote control? It got left out in the cold. That happens to our enthusiasm too.

It shouldn’t though. Our feelings are pretty unreliable to begin with, plus, if you are relying on someone else’s, that’s even worse. Don’t let someone throw cold water on those thoughts, excitement, and enthusiasm, and don’t do it to yourself! Don’t let something that was once approached with enthusiasm grow cold.

The character trait for today is Enthusiasm-expressing joy in each task as I give it my best effort (definition from characterfirst.com).

Today, approach each task with enthusiasm as if working for the Lord. Would you really grumble and complain if you could actually see the Lord sitting on your couch watching you? Now, you might be saying, “Well, I can’t just go around faking my feelings.” I’m not asking you to, but you can change your feelings.

Start being thankful. It’s amazing how unstable becomes stable when we have gratitude in us! “Thank you for a roof over my head, thank you Lord for having carpet I get to sweep, thank you for a house of my own, thank you for this washing machine, thank you that I don’t have to hand wash them, thank you that I have furniture to dust…”

Terri Sevelle Foy said that to complain is to remain. The opposite of complaining is gratitude. Sounds like if you want to progress, you’ll become thankful pretty quickly! If you start showing gratitude, the enthusiasm will come. Just do it! You’ll see. The remote just needed to be warmed-up too.