Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing. 1 Thessalonians 5:11
I’m going to get incredibly real for a second. Life can be tough. Big surprise right? Just when you make an important decision that the devil doesn’t like, watch out!
I don’t know about your schedules right now, but ours has been crazy! We’ve always been clear on priorities. God is first, family is second, work and school are next, and finally hobbies and extracurricular activities are last. I have to say that our priorities started to get a little hazy!
The other night I made a decision to slow down and focus on what needed accomplished to fit our priorities. I wanted to get my family balanced again because we were starting to topple!
My first step was for my youngest who wanted to sit down and start a book like we used to do. It was a great step in the right direction and we were so excited! No sooner had I told him our full plan for the evening (and it was full), which included the focus on him, the phone rang.
I found out a family gathering was happening in three hours, but my hubby just got back from a work trip and my son was needing attention. What was the right thing to do? I’d made a promise! I would be showing my son that other people are more important than he was if I chose them.
I knew my hubby was exhausted and my oldest had stuff going on for the next few days. I had also visited the person they were getting together for earlier in the week. I was told I needed to give an answer immediately.
I had to make a hard decision. I knew that others were also busy, but just like they’d have to make the decision on what was best for them, I had to make that decision too. This isn’t in the Bible!! Or is it? It talks about honor and respect, but can we do that while keeping our word to others? I believe the answer is yes! We can say no while staying respectful without compromising our character.
“No” is a rough word. When someone is told that you’re unable to do something, it can be seen as a rejection to that person. It really isn’t, that’s only a perception. Saying no shouldn’t make anyone feel guilty as long as it’s done in a kind way. It doesn’t make you a better person if you say yes all the time. It makes you a stressed-out one where nobody wins!
There can be a whole lot of struggles and doubt that go along with life. Every person has their own opinion for each situation that is absolutely perfect for them. The problem comes in when someone tries to manipulate, control, or create guilt by implying your decision is wrong because it isn’t what he or she would choose.
Please understand that I’m not talking about the foundations of faith. Right is right and wrong is wrong when it comes to what God says. There is room for a few different ways to get a right result in quite a few cases though. God will utilize all those different options to get His results.
Here’s an example: two people are given different ways to encourage someone. Those two ways are completely different, so does that mean one is right and the other is wrong? Remember the source from where the instructions came. Of course there’s more than one way, so why do so many people think that their way is the best?
Let’s think about our children for a second. There are times when they need tough love, other times when they need humor, and even more times when they just need understanding and patience. It all comes from love and trying to raise them right, but the love needs to be given in different ways. There isn’t a perfect fit for everything.
I had two choices the other day. It wasn’t a matter of doing something against some people, it was a matter of doing what I felt God was leading me to do for others. It was about promises and character. I couldn’t explain all that because I refused to make my hubby and children feel guilty for me not going.
That situation helped me learn that we don’t need to always understand the “why” of every single thing. Sometimes we need to simply trust that there are very good reasons for decisions made that we may not know or even need to know about.
During my battle with the hard decisions, I struggled, doubted, and worried, and this was all after the decisions were made! It was a difficult time. The weather matched my mood. It did nothing but turn cold, gloomy, and rainy.
Was it because I handled the situation wrong? No, it was because I didn’t make the decision to the best of my ability then move on. The devil accomplished his mission. He made me stuck. I wasn’t free to carry out God’s plan.
Then, what did God do? He wanted me to see that I’m not left to handle everything on my own. Obviously, He’s with us, but He’ll also use other people too. Many people started coming at me with the same message of encouragement without even knowing why they were encouraging me. Here’s the cool thing…each individual had a different way of delivering it!
Just like there isn’t always one right decision, there isn’t only one right way for someone to encourage. During that difficult time, one way wouldn’t have even done it like usual. God seemed to know He better call in the National Guard!
My point is, once you get determined to follow God’s will, whether it’s by accepting Him or accomplishing His work in a certain way, the devil will come at you by using every method He has at His disposal (including those close to you) to make you doubt exactly what you’re doing. He doesn’t like focus.
Don’t quit and give into that darkness. I finally started getting the lesson today, and God made sure He knew He blessed the words I received from all those battling the devil on my behalf. The light shined again. A strip of sun fell across the living room floor that I just sunk into so I could physically feel His love on me.
I was getting back on track just as the phone rang again! See…the devil doesn’t like it at all! This time I know better than to let it get to me.
Please have confidence and stop doubting yourself. If your heart is pure when you make a decision, even if you make a mistake, God has you covered. Accept the decision with confidence and move on. Don’t let the devil win and make you go back to yesterday. He can’t make you do anything you don’t give him permission to do. Strive for tomorrow!
Also, be very careful that you’re not trying to force your ideas on someone else. Remember that you might not have all the reasons for the decisions someone else makes. A simple, “Ok, no problem, maybe next time!” would be awesome! Allow God to guide you so that you encourage instead of letting the devil use you to tear down.
