Author: Kelly Girl

They are darkened in their understanding and separated from the life of God because of the ignorance that is in them due to the hardening of their hearts. Ephesians 4:18

We go through quite a few bags of pretzels in my house, but we get tired of them after a while. Even though we’ll eat the hard pretzels, we especially enjoy the soft ones. When I bring them home from the store, my boys can’t wait until they’re made!

At the local pretzel place, I’ve watched the bakers take dough and make that pliable rope into an actual pretzel by doing some fancy hand and wrist movements. It’s in a wonderful shape to go into the oven to bake. When they pull it out, it’s hot, soft, and delicious! The steam comes out as a piece is torn off…so good!

Those hard pretzels are a different story. We can’t tear a piece off one of those because they’ll snap and break. Even though they both went through an oven, one got hardened and one stayed soft. Whereas my oldest can’t eat the hard ones, he sure can eat the soft ones. They’re easier for the braces to deal with! Not only will the pretzels themselves snap, they can also snap a wire so we have to be careful. They have a negative effect on braces for sure!

People are quite a bit like those pretzels. Think about it. We all go through the heat, and some of us get hardened while others stay soft. The light goes out of the hardened ones. The softened hearts are more exciting, just like the softened pretzels; they attract more attention. More people are drawn to them and they get chosen more.

Once someone is hardened, they’re more likely to snap because they no longer understand those around them. Because of a hardened heart, they’re ignorant to the wisdom of God. When they don’t have His wisdom, they’re blind to what others are really meaning and are unable to love like He loves.

I challenge you to take a look at your heart. Is it still soft and pliable, letting in God’s light and wisdom? Is it getting a bit hardened that you’re unable to see anyone else’s point of view? Let me put it this way…do you insist that you’re always right without trying to understand another’s thoughts?  Remember that nothing is too big for God.  He can change that hardened heart right around!

Also, be careful being around those with a hardened heart. You will most likely get snapped at because they’re living in a pretty dark world. Be the bigger person in that situation and show your soft heart by not snapping back. People are more excited to be sharing space with a gentle bunny than a snapping turtle!

If a man has recently married, he must not be sent to war or have any other duty laid on him. For one year he is to be free to stay at home and bring happiness to the wife he has married. Deuteronomy 24:5

Ahh…that first year of marriage when my hubby was only concerned with the happiness of his wife… The food was always delicious, even though many nights it came out of a can. Nobody could’ve made better beef ravioli than me. It was the best thing he ever tasted! The cuddle time, oh the cuddle time. There wasn’t anything more pressing to do than snuggling up together in order to watch a good Iron Chef episode. Go out without his wife? He’d never want to do that when he waited so long to get married.

He’s still complimenting my food, although now I think it’s more of a fear that I’ll go on strike than it being the best thing he ever ate! We still love snuggling up together, however I know the arm trick after he thinks I’m sleeping. We’ve never tired of doing things together, but it sometimes has to be fought for. It can be difficult to simply find the time. If one of us just needs to sit around while waiting for the boys, it’s better to have company doing it. We can talk! Those long-suffering sighs of my loved one are really ones of pure contentment. Seriously though, we’re a team!

We give it our best to play a game in the evening or just spend some time together. He’s even made a date with me for when the boys were off to bed. I starved just a tad, but it was worth it! The youngest got into it too by helping him set everything up. Having some time with your spouse doesn’t have to be fancy or cost any money, it just needs thoughtful effort.

Guess what! I have a date tomorrow. A true, by ourselves, alone date! I think it’s been weeks…umm nope, maybe months…hmm I don’t think so, YEARS! It’s been years? Well, it really doesn’t matter what we do then, it’s going to be pretty special. The boys have an activity to go to that doesn’t require the hubby or me. I was thinking that we could get the grocery shopping done, but maybe that isn’t such a good idea. It does sound kind of romantic to stroll down the isle without items flying off the shelves into my cart though. Oh wait, the hubby WILL be there.

It is of vital importance that we make marriage a priority. It’s incredibly important for me to keep a strong relationship now, so we don’t struggle when it’s just the two of us. I love that man of mine, and even if the first year is well behind us, I can still look forward to many more memories. After all these years, my hubby is still dazzled by his wife!

If you’re married, no matter how busy you are, make sure to allow time for your spouse. Think back to that first year of marital bliss, and start trying to impress again. Your spouse deserves it as much now, if not more!

For the foolishness of God is wiser than human wisdom, and the weakness of God is stronger than human strength. 1 Corinthians 1:25

When the boys were a little younger, we decided to take them on a short hike. We came to a fire tower opened to the public along the path we were taking. It was time for an adventure to see the magnificent views from the top that it offered. Part way up the 87 1/2-foot climb, the doubt started setting in. It didn’t seem as stable the higher we climbed because the wind made it sway quite a bit. Also, the grates certainly did give us a view, but I’m not so sure that was a positive thing.

As we were heading to the top, it got pretty scary. The oldest strongly indicated he was through with that nonsense and the hubby quickly offered to take him back to the bottom. They were gone faster than I could blink. That left me with the youngest. I’m not admitting that me knees were knocking or anything!

The climb to the top is never easy. Sometimes we don’t make it the first time, or even the second. I have a goal that I haven’t reached after trying and trying and trying (I could go on, but you get the point). I refuse to believe I’ve failed. I’ll only fail if I give up. I learn from each of those fails, so even if I’m not “succeeding” according to the goal, I’m succeeding in growing. I just want it even more after each of those fails. Some call it being stubborn, but this is one of those times stubborn is a good thing!

We face doubts, fears, and insecurities in our climbs. It feels much safer at the bottom. Isn’t that why so many people are there, and so few at the top? It has nothing to do with ability, but with drive. I keep asking myself why it’s so important, and that answer makes me refuse to give up. Everyone’s top is different. I hope your main climb isn’t material, but with matters of the spirit. If you’re in God’s will, there’s no doubt that you’ll see success if only you’ll allow Him to give you the wisdom along the way. Much will come against you, but God is more important than insecurities.

If one person in our family was at the top of that fire tower in need of help, there is not a doubt in my mind that every last one of us would run to the top without hesitation. The reason is more important than our insecurities. It has to be that way with God’s will too. If your “why” is that it’s what God wants, you better not quit! You’ll lose those fears pretty quickly to get to the top, if not, you’ll be too busy getting there to worry about them.

Know that the higher you go, the scarier the climb is. Just remember that the weakness of God is stronger than human strength. You might not be able to get there on your own, but you’ll get there with Him!

From the ends of the earth I call to you, I call as my heart grows faint; lead me to the rock that is higher than I. Psalm 61:2

I will refresh the weary and satisfy the faint.” Jeremiah 31:25

How many of you start to feel overwhelmed this time of year? We’re excited that the weather is getting nicer, but that also means our time of hibernation is coming to a close. The kids start bouncing off the walls because they feel like being cooped up learning is coming to an end. They get antsy and have a hard time focusing. Teachers and parents are looking a little frazzled as evening draws near. The activities seem to pick up and all of a sudden the family time seems to be dwindling faster than anyone likes.

The nicer weather brings along with it the dreaded lists. I just might have first hand experience with this, so let me direct this to women right now…do NOT under ANY circumstances mention a list to your man. A list is one of the many ways my hubby and I are a bit different. I love lists; he hates them.

My mind feels like it can’t hold all the items that are swirling around in there, so lists are my way of being clear about what I need to get accomplished. When I write it down, I don’t have to remember it again and can let it go. It’s such a relief to me! If not, I feel like I’m walking through a dense fog while knowing there’s something just out of reach that I’ve thought about before, but it’s too fuzzy to remember exactly what it is. Drives me crazy!

My hubby is more of the out of sight, out of mind category. As long as he doesn’t see it all written down, he can cope! Here’s the deal…women can write down the list, but ask nicely for him to help accomplish one thing at a time. This is a fantastic area to practice your flirting skills. I don’t think I’ve ever really flirted, but the hubby likes it when I try.

I had a very wise man tell me tonight that I need to ask for help. He reminded me that God put people in place that would be happy to give some advice. It was time I asked for it. I started with God because I needed Him to lead me to the rock that is higher than I (Psalm 61:2). I knew He’d answer because I was weary and He said He’d refresh me!

Then, I talked to my own family after sending an email off for advice. We all worked together in order to get done what needed to be done and had fun doing it. I wasn’t alone!

Finally, I got alone for some quiet time and turned on the sound of the waves. I pretended I was in a lounge chair on that rock God led me to. You see…I took a vacation in the comfort of my own home. It was so real that the pup and I even jumped when the seagull called out!  Seriously, we did.

I challenge you to take a vacation the next time you’re feeling overwhelmed. Take a vacation right there in your own home! If someone wants to interrupt your time, kindly let them know that you’re unavailable at the moment.  You’re on vacation!

For they refreshed my spirit and yours also. Such men deserve recognition. 1 Corinthians 16:18

Boys are strange. I was walking to my bedroom this morning and saw the most unusual sight. There was this big black growth between the trim of my door and the wall. It sort of made my heart pound for a moment before I got close enough to realize what it was. It was socks. Yes, you heard me right. Socks! I was baffled.

The logical question would be simply, “WHAT?” Since I consider myself a logical person, I proceeded to ask that very question to my oldest. The detective in me pieced together that he was the culprit due to the socks being his. I was informed they were fresh out of his drawer and clean. I guess I was a bit relieved to hear that, but please tell me how that answered my question.

Attempting to understand boys, but knowing that it wasn’t highly likely, I asked, “Why?” Surprisingly, there apparently was a very clear answer to this. The oldest said, “To see how long it would take you to notice it. Mom, you went past it once without seeing it.” I had to inform it that it would be hard to see when I was leaving the room. Just because I’ve convinced them I have eyes in the back of my head, it really isn’t necessarily true. You can’t make this stuff up!

There seems to be a trend of seeing how long it takes me to recognize something is different in my home. The other day, my hubby did a task that I said I needed to do. When I thanked him for it, I learned it was apparently a test to see how quickly I’d notice it. Did my boys get this oddity from their father or are all boys just strange? They believe it will make me more attentive. Excuse me?  I’m not the one who will actually step over an item several times instead of realizing it should be picked up!

Do you appreciate the quirks of people, or do they just make you annoyed? Frankly, my life would be pretty dull without these guys. Even though I still think they’re strange, I wouldn’t have it any other way. They make life exciting! For the record, they think the same about girls.

God made each of us special. I challenge you to not be annoyed at the differences he puts into us, but celebrate them! God provides all different ways to refresh our spirit. Sometimes we need to see things from different (strange) views in order to live life to the fullest!

And God is able to bless you abundantly, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work. 2 Corinthians 9:8

I just got done seeing a picture that actually looked beautiful, but was scary at the same time. The explosion from a volcano in the picture was not something I’d want to see in real life. I’m sure many volcanologists would probably be thrilled to witness that amazing sight. I read that they often visit active volcanoes to collect samples for studying. The eruption of that molten lava will help them figure out a way to predict future eruptions in order to save the lives of many people.

When I want questions answered in a way that’s easy to understand, I’ve found that explanations for children are the best! I headed to www.weatherwizkids.com to refresh my memory on volcanoes. It told me that volcanoes are natural disasters, and aren’t associated with weather. How about that? It says that a volcano is a mountain that opens downward to molten rock (called magma). When magma works its way to the surface and pressure builds up, it erupts to form lava flows and ash deposits.

Just like the eruption from pressure in a volcano, we can see eruption from pressure in us. It can be quite a magnificent sight until all the devastation is seen surrounding us. The article talked about eruptions causing everything from mudslides and avalanches to floods, tsunamis, and earthquakes. Here we thought it was just that lava that was the problem, but nope. It’s all the other stuff that the eruption causes. It also said that as the volcano continues to erupt, it gets bigger and bigger. Hmm…think about that for a minute.

Even if we have our tempers under control, we need to be careful. Even a dormant volcano has the possibility to erupt in the future. Are you keeping the pressure inside down so that eruptions will not be occurring?

Were you perhaps in the path during an eruption by someone else? Just like with a volcano erupting and producing rich soil, good can come from being in a path of another’s eruption. God can take that and He’ll find a way to bless you abundantly despite or because of it!

The hardworking farmer should be the first to receive a share of the crops. 2 Timothy 2:6

I was talking to my long-distance dog trainer who’s tough as nails yesterday when he gave me an assignment for today. I was to work my pup for two hours throughout the day on specific things. My response was, “TWO HOURS?” I was looking at my hubby knowing that he was going to straighten this out. I must’ve heard incorrectly. Wrong! My ears were working just fine; it was my attitude that wasn’t.

I believe that was when my trainer quickly apologized for being so demanding and told me he’d certainly give me a different lesson plan that would only take a few minutes. He informed me that it was his mistake for not realizing I was going for mediocrity. He would definitely adjust his assignment to fit the outcome I was going for. Oh boy…he knows how to get me fired up!

I very quickly revealed that I strive for excellence and my aim is not to be mediocre. I might have told him to bring it on. Good thing I also consider him a friend! He sure knows how to get me to see things his way doesn’t he?

My youngest was my assistant today and I think that he’s taken some pointers from the drill sergeant of a trainer I have. He mapped out exactly what we were going to do for the first part of our training. He had a goal in mind and a clear route to achieving it. With clipboard in hand, he informed me of what he expected. I was being judged. No cutting corners for me!

What a blast we had! Oh, the pup enjoyed it too. I didn’t even take him on a walk tonight because of all the physical and mental exercise he had throughout the day. If I keep up this pace, we’ll be ready to tackle anything! If we put in mediocrity, we’ll get mediocre results. If we put in excellence, we’ll get excellent results.

If you were given an ambitious assignment, would you tell me how you couldn’t wait to get started or would you start finding reasons you don’t have time to complete it? Is there an area of your life that you’re expecting excellence but putting in only a mediocre effort? I challenge you to be hardworking so you can enjoy your results!

The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit. Proverbs 18:21

The hubby brought home a book by Dale Carnegie called Effective Speaking. It piqued my curiosity, so even though I don’t give speeches, I figured I’d check it out. I’ve only read Part I, but do you know what I realized? I was meant to read this book! I’ve already learned something that I desperately needed reminded of:  to be excited about my subject when talking. The fundamentals of effective speaking are something each one of us can use in everyday life.

I have two boys that need to listen to me talk for how long each day? It just might be too long if you ask them! After starting this book, I realized that a sincere enthusiasm would make the difference between an exciting year of homeschooling and a dreaded year of homeschooling. I’ve noticed that when I just start reading a lesson, they tend to not be as engaged. On the other hand, if I get excited about what we’re learning and we stop to discuss what we already know or relate it to past experiences, I have their attention.

Whenever we started to homeschool, I remember the excitement. We couldn’t wait for the day to begin! I know that they’re older now, but that doesn’t give me a license to wilt and lose my effectiveness. They might not show their enthusiasm by bouncing up and down in their seats with big smiles on their faces, but now I’m going to take on the challenge to come as close to that as I can get! Instead of griping about my “class” looking bored, maybe I need to stop being boring!

I think it’s time that I pull out the old enthusiasm that was there years ago and make this interesting again. Instead of waiting for the boys to get a good attitude, it’s time that I get the ball rolling! I needed to remind myself how amazing education is. Enthusiasm is contagious and this is one of those times that I want them to catch it from me!

Are you excited about what you talk about? If you see others light up when having a conversation, you’re doing it…you’re spreading the enthusiasm! Bring life to conversations and remember that bored people are boring. Don’t be bored and keep things exciting! See the wonderful things that will happen when you get your spark back. Let others light up with your spark…your words!

My son, do not let wisdom and understanding out of your sight, preserve sound judgment and discretion; they will be life for you, an ornament to grace your neck. Then you will go on your way in safety, and your foot will not stumble. Proverbs 3:21-23

When my time is up here on the earth, I hope to have passed down some wisdom to my children. I certainly don’t have all the answers, but I sure want to learn more each day. If I’m continuing to learn, then I can teach. If I have valuable information to teach, they can grow. The more they grow, the better prepared they are for life.

They can choose to ignore what I’ve told them, but at least I’ll know I did what I could. It would be one of my biggest regrets to have knowledge inside of me that could’ve helped them that I never bothered passing on. Yes, everyone definitely needs to learn through experience, but we can’t ever use that excuse to keep silent now. Even if we feel like our youth aren’t hearing, it just might come back to them when they need it most.

A piece of wisdom that was taught to me that I’ve passed on to my boys has to do with pointing out others’ faults. Sometimes our flesh so badly wants to talk about what all someone has been doing wrong, how they hurt us, and what we can’t believe they said. We would do just about anything to let it come out of our mouths even when we absolutely know that we shouldn’t. I’ve told the boys that when we’re pointing out all those negatives of someone, we have three fingers pointing back at ourselves.

We were sitting at the dinner table tonight discussing our day when my youngest just knew he shouldn’t say what he wanted to, but decided he’d get creative so he could satisfy his flesh. Let me tell you, his mind had to have been was working at warp speed.

As soon as a certain topic was brought up he started by saying, “I’m not going to point one finger.” I was thrilled! He remembered the lesson that he was taught quite a while ago. Then, he continued without missing a beat saying, “Someone…” as he was getting it all out, he was looking at his brother with ALL fingers pointed right at him. He didn’t want us telling him to look at the three pointing back at him! We lost it…we laughed so hard and even his brother couldn’t get mad. It was so funny, but that isn’t how it works!

The next time you think that children don’t hear what you’re saying, realize that they really do. Just like with us, it might take some time to see results in what we’re doing, but I’m confident that it will happen. It’ll help our children go on their way in safety and not stumble.  Don’t give up!

Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize. 1 Corinthians 9:24

One day during a family gathering the nieces decided to show me different ways to do splits. They weren’t talking about making my much-loved banana splits either! I started going off into my own world as I remembered being young and NOT very flexible.

Since it wasn’t something that came naturally to me, I automatically would say, “I’m not flexible.” Hey, what you say you believe. How quickly I could’ve changed my lack of flexibility if I would’ve said to myself, “You aren’t flexible now, but just see how flexible you’ll be in a month!” Those words, a visual picture, and a little practice would’ve brought me to success quicker than I would’ve ever believed.

Here I was years later and I couldn’t let two young, impressionable girls think that just because you get older, you can’t keep trying! That wouldn’t have set a very good example. I did what any self-respecting aunt would do in a bit of a formal setting. I was going to overcome all odds and do a split…hopefully without ripping out my jeans. That thought did cross my mind for a second.

I figured that socks on hardwood floors would drastically help my position since once I started, I probably wouldn’t be too quick to stop! Unlike when I was younger, I had more confidence in my abilities. You see, I had been doing quite a bit of stretching exercises. I also figured that the hubby could always help me back up if I got a wee bit stuck.

It may not have been graceful and I may not have made a complete split, but I was showing the girls that we get much further in anything we try if we believe we can do it. I wouldn’t have accomplished anything if I never even tried.

I’ve learned that we shouldn’t ever tell ourselves or let another person tell us something is impossible. I’m not willing to give up before I even start. Just because we begin one way doesn’t mean that we’ll always be that way. We’re able to change! Also, we should never ever compare ourselves to another person, and we should never ever, ever let anyone else do that to us. We need to compete only with ourselves.

What about you…have you been very flexible lately? Have you been willing to attempt something that there’s not a guarantee you’ll get the first time? Are you defeated before you even can visualize the victory? Don’t worry about looking silly because you might, but you’ll have much more fun trying and laughing than sitting and not living. Remember that you’ll never succeed if you never even try.

“Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you’ll land among the stars.” -Norman Vincent Peale