Kelly Girl Thinks

Preach the word; be prepared in season and out of season; correct, rebuke and encourage–with great patience and careful instruction. 2 Timothy 4:2

I feel a strong need to work through something that I can’t stand creeping into my life. That is a critical attitude. I hope that as I’m rambling today, it helps remind you the importance of gentleness, kindness, and wisdom.

Do you ever say something you regret? You saw a problem and saw a solution, so you just felt you needed to share your revelation. You opened your mouth to speak, but your words weren’t coming out the way you wanted them to. Have you ever gotten so frustrated that you became overwhelmed with emotion and kept trying to explain, but it just got worse? What does this mean?

My guess…you care a whole lot for that person. Emotions were guiding you though, not wisdom. When I am passionate about something, I don’t always know how to project encouragement, patience, and positive, careful instruction. This happens to me with my hubby, my sons, and my pup. I want the absolute best for them, but my words can come out critical and harsh. This is not ok.

Let’s look at the old phrase that says you catch more flies with honey than you do with vinegar. We’ll be better received and find more success in our communication if it is done in an encouraging, nice manner rather than a sour, mean manner. What happens when we speak out of frustration? We’re more likely to have the vinegar present than the honey.

I’ve often heard people say that they were just being honest. That still doesn’t make being rude acceptable; it just repels others from a thought that was actually quite sound if it were handled in a totally different way. It leaves the other person and us embarrassed, and more likely to hold onto negative feeling rather than see a solution. It creates feelings of bitterness and resentment.

Most of the time, we need to work on our own faults and focus on the positive aspects of our loved ones. The times when we are truly convicted that God wants us to say something out of love, we need to make sure that it’s done at the right time, quietly, calmly, and with lots of encouragement, patience, and love.

Let’s face it, as parents it’s our job to lead and correct; however, there is a right way and a wrong way to go about it. One leads to respect and closer relationships, and the other leads to disappointment, regret, and broken relationships. When we correct out of frustration, we tend to do it the wrong way.

We also need to remember that our spouse is not our child. Words of rebuke should be few and far between. Unless God is guiding your words, you’re better to not say anything at all. I know that I want those I trust to guide me on becoming a better person, and to not hold back information that could help me. Having said that, I don’t want my confidence to suffer through thoughtless words either.

I challenge you to be gentle with your words today. Make sure that the sincere compliments far outweigh the corrections.

 

When Jesus spoke again to the people, he said, “I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.” John 8:12

As we crossed the bridge into island life for our vacation, the trustworthy pattern of the familiar lighthouse welcomed us back. It was time for us to slow down and breathe a sigh of release as we let go of all tension and stress of daily life.

I admit stress would keep trying to creep back in throughout the week, but that was what the respite was for. It needed dealt with over a period of time. Just like we brush our teeth everyday, but still need to go to the dentist for a good cleaning to prevent plaque buildup…we were scraping away the stress buildup.

We can get renewed through daily time with God, but still need a little more focused time with Him throughout the year. That’s what this vacation was about. It was for getting quiet and listening. Our vacations usually contain a learning aspect to them. We want to come home stronger than when we left.

The lighthouse felt like a comfy hug. I needed a visual reminder of God’s navigation in my life, knowing He’s with me to warn of hazards, help me see where I am, and to guide me to my destination. His wisdom is my light to navigate life, and loosing sight of it puts me in a position of danger.

The danger comes into my life when I go along thinking everything is just fine, yet I’m not focused on God’s light.  That’s when I miss the signals I’m about to crash. I needed to remember that life isn’t about fitting God into my schedule. It’s about letting God be my beacon within the schedule, guiding me on what to do and where the hazards are. I would venture out throughout the week just to get a view of that lighthouse.

Some of my best learning took place in my morning walks with the pup. When I wasn’t chuckling over his uncoordinated efforts to walk due to distractions, I was focused on the wildlife. I was listening to the whisper (or some days the howling) of the wind, the birds’ voices, and the soothing sound of the water.

I was seeing the elegance and strength in the birds’ movements no matter the strength of the wind. I saw how the rabbit waited and watched while assessing situations before making decisions on what to do. I watched squirrels simply climb higher when they felt they needed to get out of harm’s way.

I’ve never seen snakes like I did on that trip, but there was a message there too. They showed me that there’s no reason to fear something that God already has control over. He’ll make me aware of the hazards.

The most surprising part of nature that had the biggest lesson for me was the turtles. I’ve never seen so many turtles in my life. I’ve viewed a good many on previous trips, but it was as if God was trying to get a message across to me. They even kept popping up on the entire drive home just to make sure I understood the lesson!

I believe He was telling me to slow down. I was to stop rushing about trying to accomplish things that were taking my focus away from Him. He has the best plan for my life, but as long as I’m trying to accomplish my goals and not His, I’ll never really feel like I’ve accomplished anything. I’ll never be truly fulfilled in life.

That’s what the stress has been all about…trying to be everything for everybody. I had already started to learn that lesson, but I was still feeling guilty about everyone else’s thoughts on the matter. It took some searching and help to recognize what the moral of the trip was all about.

I challenge you to slow down and be aware of your environment and what you can learn from it. Slow down and listen to what God’s will is for your life. Be aware that it might not be what others want from you, but trust Him to navigate you through life safely. Follow His guiding light and receive His amazing hope because all the other accomplishments will never bring you the peace that can be found in following Him.

“Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also. Matthew 6:19-21

We just got back from a much-needed vacation where I learned a very important lesson from my pup. As we were packing up to leave home, he was curious and a little overwhelmed by all the “stuff” strewn everywhere. Ok, I admit, he was curious and I was overwhelmed. By the time we were packed up and ready to go, it was a controlled excitement on his part. It didn’t seem to be so much about where he was going, but about making sure we didn’t leave without him!

This wasn’t the first trip he’s made with us, so I was fairly confidant that he’d do just fine. We tend to put human emotions on animals. Is he going to be comfortable and adjust to the new environment? When we got to the house where we were staying, I realized there was no reason to worry. He did what I should come to expect from him. He treated it all as if it were some relaxed adventure.

The change in environment had no impact on his eating or behavior. He was just ready for whatever we put in front of him. As long as he had his master to lead him, he was happy and content to follow. Those funny looking birds and ducks didn’t even make him flinch. It was the same world, just a different view.

Can we say that we’re so easy to adapt to change? That pup didn’t even know if we were going back to the place he calls home or if he’d see all his toys again, but it didn’t matter. His world was perfect because he knew where home was. He certainly doesn’t find a home in a structure; home is wherever we are. Contentment covers him as long as he has us to follow.

There was a huge lesson in his attitude for me. Would I be so quick and enthusiastic to follow my Master? Is my treasure stored with Him or within a structure filled with “stuff” that I call home? There isn’t anything wrong with having things, but when they hold us back from following where we’re called to be, then it’s a big problem.

I’ve often wondered about that. Am I able to be transported quickly and with excitement to wherever God leads? Am I storing up so much “stuff” that I’m tied to one area? Just like the pup wouldn’t have been happy even if he stayed in his home, but we left. We can’t be happy if we stay in our earthly home (no matter how comfortable it is) when God is ready for us to go elsewhere.

You see, it isn’t about the stuff we have, it’s about who we’re with. Give that some thought today. Are you ready to pick up and go if God says it’s time?

 

Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord. Romans 12:11

When I was taking the pup on a walk this morning, I really put on the miles. I mean I went all over. While strolling along, I was greeted by several squirrels that were loving life so much that I had to interrupt their game of chase so that they didn’t run into me.  Such joy those animals had!

When I got into a busier area, I came across the special few that had huge smiles on their faces while giving me a hearty “Good morning!” I even had the zealous ones that were driving along while enthusiastically waving from their vehicles. Boy, I’ll tell you, that made me feel on top of the world! Those people emulated warmth that I would picture Jesus showing.

While walking passed a pretty white church, I came across a sign that took me back a little. It said, “No Trespassing.” Well, those people that showed such zeal seemed much warmer than the beautiful building all of a sudden.

It was bazaar because I’d think that would be the first place you’d want people to trespass! Please understand that I get where they were coming from and I did find other words that said, “unless for church business.” Again though, isn’t everything church business?

I’m sure they’re just trying to keep their parking lot from being overrun be visitors needing a parking place. Also, they weren’t the only church that stating their parking lot was for the church only, but wouldn’t that be a good outreach? Just think about it. Ha! They’re on our property now, free game!

We have to remember that a church is people not a building. The building is where you can go to find the church-the people.

I’d look forward to sitting down and having a chat with the smiling and friendly people out and about this morning. They represented the Lord with their happy spirit, but I have to be honest, I was a little intimidated by that sign this morning.

If I’d be reluctant to enter because I wasn’t sure of my welcome, I’d be concerned of missed opportunities for others. We need to make sure our buildings represent the warmth that is needed to have someone sit down for a little chat.

Always remember that you’re the Lord’s church. Serving Him means showing a warmth and kindness, like He did, with every person you meet. Make sure your face and continence doesn’t read “No Trespassing!”

Instead, have it say, “Welcome, it’s great to see you!” You just might make someone feel on top of the world, and they might pass on that good feeling to someone else. You could be the difference in the mood of so many people in one day with your enthusiasm. It could be a ripple effect and you were the stone thrown into the pond!

Someday, someone might question what’s so special about you that allows you to be so filled with joy. You’ll be prepared to simply say, “I serve the Lord.” There’s the church in action!

 

If you do what is right, will you not be accepted? But if you do not do what is right, sin is crouching at your door; it desires to have you, but you must rule over it.” Genesis 4:7

Last night we looked out the window to see a green tree frog stuck to the glass. I decided to go outside to get a cool picture. It had already moved onto the siding of the house by the time I got out there, but I got a picture anyway. The next thing I knew, there was another one on the window. I snapped a few pictures of it and wanted to get inside so I didn’t disturb them any more.

I went to open the door and sure enough, there was a third one! Well then, I’d go in a different way. Oh no I wouldn’t, there was another bright green creature on that door too. Was an invitation sent out and I just didn’t realize we were hosting a party?

As I very quickly and carefully made my way inside, fearful we’d get a guest that wasn’t invited in, I realized how easily we open the door to undesirable things in our life too.

Just as easily as those frogs could have come in the open door, any kind of sin can come inside once we choose the wrong actions. Not only that one frog could’ve gotten in, but his friends could’ve easily joined him.

You see, the frogs didn’t just appear, they were all out there to begin with. I just didn’t see them. I was so focused on one that I missed the rest.

Be on guard not just for what you can see, but keep your eyes open for the others that come along and try to get in where they’re unwelcome. Be diligent in doing what is right all the time. Once you open the door for one sin, several seem to follow.

 

And now what are you waiting for? Get up, be baptized and wash your sins away, calling on his name.’ Acts 22:16

If I had to guess, one of my dad’s favorite hunting seasons is spring gobbler. He loves to get out in the woods as the forest starts to show new signs of life. He recently took my oldest out and told him all kinds of stories while sitting under a tree. My son enjoyed hearing stories of days gone by from his pap. Those are the memory making times.

On the flip side to these wonderful memories, are the times when a turkey call is being practiced in my house. Over and over and over again. Let’s just say that if what I was hearing is what a turkey sounds like, it needs medical attention fast.

These were practiced in my house along with owl hoots. When you’re sitting around a campfire at night and let loose with a good owl hoot and get a return call, it’s an awesome thing! We’ve had them come into the trees close to us on different occasions. My dad still teaches the saying “who cooks for you, who cooks for y’all” to give a good owl hoot.

If hunters want to call in turkeys, they use a turkey call. If they want to call in deer, they use a deer call. You see where I’m going right? Sometimes, we use a call to attract something we have no desire to come to us.

Be careful what words you put out there. You’ll receive what you’re calling for. Don’t use your words to get the devil all excited. He’ll see a weakness and will be able to use you for his evil ways. When you call on the Lord, you get love, peace, joy, hope, and eternal life.

Watch who you’re calling today. Choose the call that leads to a joyful, abundant life.

 

A happy heart makes the face cheerful, but heartache crushes the spirit. Proverbs 15:13

The other day we were in the car and I was reading a book. In it were the lyrics to a song whose words stirred up an emotion in me, and before I knew it, the pup was sticking his face between the seats in order to let me know I needed to get it under control. It wasn’t specifically the words so much as the memory attached to them.

I’ve seen grown men hear a song, and the emotions stirred up were so strong that they needed to walk away in order to get themselves under control. The songs sang at funerals are especially high on the emotional level. It’s really pretty amazing.

I was thinking that if we can create positive emotions that strong to keep in memory banks to pull out whenever we’re feeling low, we’d never stay down for long! I found a need, but how am I going to fulfill it?

How can we mention just a few words in order to draw out a sensation so strong that we can’t help but laugh out loud or get pulled out of that funk we might get into? You know what I’m talking about.

The best I can come up with is time and humor. If we aren’t making memories, there won’t be any memories to draw from in the times when they’re needed most. Also, if we’re always running around stressed and busy, we’ll have a hard time finding the things to laugh about.

I challenge you to simply start the ball rolling in order to go in the right direction. First, relax! What does that look like to you? Is it taking a long walk, reading a good book, going fishing? Next, look for the humor in situations.

All I have to do is take Mr. Nosy (the pup) for a walk where there’s some interesting distractions and watch him become so engrossed in a vehicle that he stumbles over his own feet…or paws…or legs…you know what I mean! I can pull those memories up and laugh when I feel like crying.  That’s a big step in the right direction.

Start small and that will lead up to spreading the fun around to your children, your family, or even your friends. Everything is a memory in the making.  Let the deposits you make be positive ones that will lift up and strengthen, cause smiles and encouragement, and keep the heart happy.

“Each day of our lives we make deposits in the memory banks of our children.”  -Charles R. Swindoll

 

You, dear children, are from God and have overcome them, because the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world. 1 John 4:4

As we were driving to town yesterday with the sky so blue and the sun shining brightly, we had an awesome experience. We had an eagle flying above our vehicle with us for a short distance. It was hard to tell at first glance what kind of bird it was because we were mostly focused on it leading us. All of a sudden we realized it was a majestic bald eagle!

We allow so many thoughts and words to come at us from the outside world, there are times when God will send something to visually get our attention.  Something that helps us to remember what the Holy Spirit has already taught us.

I had previously been taught that when we keep our eyes focused on the world with obstacles in our line of vision, we see chaos, negativity, and problems. When we look up, we see peace, positivity, and answers. That is when we’re expecting and believing.

With so many thoughts swirling in my head and so much to accomplish, I needed reminded on what to stay focused on because we so easily forget those old lessons. Yesterday was one of those times. He wasn’t teaching a new concept, He was reminding me of one that I learned sitting in front of a fire one day.

Just because times get busy, don’t think of it as a reason to set your time with God aside. This is the most important time to focus on Him. Through Him is our supernatural wisdom, supernatural energy, supernatural focus. We have to work smarter, not necessarily harder. We can do that by looking up!

Today, don’t skimp on God time. Look up and be ready for His reminders of what He’s already taught you and new lessons He has waiting to share. You’re from God. Repeat that until it sinks deep down inside you…”I’m from God.”

When you’re overwhelmed, frustrated, fearful, lonely, brokenhearted, angry, or low on energy, look away from the chaos of the world and look up to remember that the One who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world. The one who is in the world will try to tell you differently, but the truth will set you free!

 

Why, my soul, are you downcast? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God. Psalm 42:11

My oldest was beyond excited to go to the orthodontist today. He was finally getting his braces off and wanted to make that appointment just as early as he could. I had to calm him down a bit and remind him that it would be much better overall to make it mid-morning instead of early morning so we could walk the pup before leaving.

He relented and allowed me those couple hours, but you’ve never seen a more enthusiastic boy. I mean he had a list of the food he hasn’t been allowed to eat all ready to buy. That boy even planned out what type of gum he wanted to chew. He was focused and determined to do what he had to in order to get that food in front of him. He’d already gotten me to agree to make some chicken buffalo dip to go with those long awaited tortilla chips that were on his list. Being the intuitive mom that I am, I recognized this was quite a big deal to him.

Everything was going along great until something happened two days ago that slowed down his momentum a bit. We were at the orthodontist to get him ready for the retainer he’d need after the braces came off. As soon as I walked into the room with him, he picked up on that never ending conversation, telling me how excited he was for me to make that dip for tortilla chips. When he has an idea, he surely doesn’t give it up too easily. He really makes sure we all stay on the same page as him. Sometimes that works out for him, sometimes not so much.

This is the point where things looked like there could be a hiccup in his plans. The orthodontist looked at him a little funny and said, “Just be sure you don’t break any of those bottom brackets off.” Was this the doctor giving him a hard time or wasn’t he getting all of his braces off? He was a little too stunned to ask. He absolutely knew that all the braces were coming off…didn’t he?

As the day wore on, his enthusiasm kept dimming. He was living in such suspense. Yesterday, the office called to remind us about the appointment that they were sure my son wouldn’t let us forget. The time to have his dreams realized or to throw cold water on his plans came; I asked if they were taking all his braces off or just the top ones. The dreaded result was heard…only the top ones were coming off.

Oh no! How did this misunderstanding happen? The even bigger issue was that I was the one that had to give him the disappointing news! You would’ve thought that everything he worked towards was crashing down around him when I told him. How was this possible?

This was the time we needed to take a deep breath and look at the big picture. The good news was that half of his braces were coming off. The other good news was that it wouldn’t be long until the other half came off. As much as it hurt to give up that food and gum for just a little while longer, he was almost at the end and would have beautiful teeth!

How many times have we faced a disappointment where we let it dim our excitement and appreciation of something? I’ve seen this time and again with vacation. The boys are always so excited to go somewhere and incredibly appreciative to get to go where they didn’t think they’d be able to…until something doesn’t go their way. It could be as simple as waiting one more hour before going fishing on the trip. It could be not getting ice cream until the next day. It’s absolutely silly, but it could turn an enjoyable time away into misery over something so trivial.

We see the absurdity in it, but do we see it when it’s us that’s facing a bit of disappointment? I’ll be completely up front with you, it can happen to me for sure. I have to be very careful that I take a minute to look at the big picture rather than focus on that one little thing that isn’t going my way.

Let me tell you that I’m beyond excited to get away again when I didn’t think we’d be able to in the near future. I was willing to stay in any shack available! That is…until I found a dream house right on the water that was a very real possibility. I couldn’t believe it was actually going to happen! You want to talk about someone more excited than my son getting his braces off, it was me! Until it wasn’t going to work out. This is where I needed to remind myself that a couple days before I wasn’t going anywhere.

I had to look at things not out of disappointment, but out of that same gratitude I originally had. We ended up booking a place that’s absolutely lovely and allows us to stay a few extra days. The other place just wasn’t meant to be for this trip and I know God has a better plan for us. I don’t have to quit and give up on my dream location, but I also don’t have to be unhappy right now either. I need to trust that when it’s supposed to happen, it will.

Disappointments are going to occur. However, instead of them becoming a reason to wallow in self-pity, pull yourself right back up. Joel Osteen said, “Don’t get on board with your emotions. They aren’t in charge, you’re in charge.” Trust God more than your emotions! He also said to turn it around and make a declaration of faith like David did in Psalm 42:11

I dare you to start talking to yourself with words which bring hope and lines up with God, instead of those words of disappointment and despair that play into the devil’s hands. Come on…you know I’m not the only one who talks to herself. If you’re going to be doing it anyhow, you might as well try those words of encouragement rather than the pitiful words you like when having the pity party where the only guest is you. You’ll have more of a shot at getting someone else to join you!

 

In vain you rise early and stay up late, toiling for food to eat– for he grants sleep to those he loves. Psalm 127:2

Finally, I got great sleep! This doesn’t seem like much to many people because a lack of sleep is normal instead of the exception. I can definitely tell the difference, and if children are involved, I’m certain you can too. Why does society frown upon sleep? Why is it that the busier someone is, the more they’re respected? I’m going to tell you why I think that’s ridiculous just from my own personal experience.

I fell asleep incredibly early last night and woke up feeling better than I’ve felt in ages. I never woke up through the night and got fantastic sleep. My outlook on life is much more positive! I’m excited to tackle tasks instead of overwhelmed. I’m content with my circumstances instead of grumbling. All of that right there is huge and well worth fighting to have, even if there were no other benefits!

I had a doctor tell me the importance of sleep and my health. I believe this is so true! I figured I’d look it up online to let you know some of the health benefits I was able to find under health.com. Did you know it improves our memory and makes us learn better? That’s something I can get really happy about…I can use all the help I can get! Why else do we insist our children get plenty of sleep for school? Do we think we should stop learning at a certain age?

Sleep affects our stamina, creativity, attention, weight, stress and anxiety, and our driving ability. Our overall health has a lot to do with sleep. We’re simply not as impatient and irritable, so I’m sure if we explain this to our spouses, they’d do everything they could to help us get that sleep we so desperately need. Why wouldn’t they want a much more pleasant home? Why wouldn’t we want to feel better?

Don’t sabotage your day before you even start it. Get a fantastic night’s sleep and see the world in a brighter, clearer, happier, and more positive light! You’ll experience so much enthusiasm because sleep is a blessing and well worth receiving.