Kelly Girl Thinks

Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.” John 14:6

When we built our house, we had to excavate and get the trees cleared for where the house was to go and to have a yard. So…we purposely took away the shade to keep it cool on hot days, we took away a windbreak for on the cold days, and we put in a yard. What does that leave us with? More work! It doesn’t make sense when we are the ones to plant the grass and put fertilizer on it to make it grow even faster and thicker, then complain about mowing it! God provided perfectly beautiful woods for shade, but we wanted grass. Friends of mine, who aren’t from the United States, can’t understand this crazy way of thinking. They said if God thought we needed us to have grass, He would have provided it. We needed the trees, He provided, but we got rid of them…we complicate things!

When I started to homeschool I was given the great advice to keep it simple. This is where we go wrong. We’ve stopped keeping things simple! We ask our hubbies what they are thinking about, and when they say nothing, we overanalyze. They really do mean nothing…keep it simple! When we allow our children to be involved in too many activities at one time, the whole family suffers, and the kids don’t enjoy any of it. Choose only one or two activities…keep it simple! When the dog is running around and not listening, attach a leash to him or put him in the crate for a few minutes instead of yelling and running around like one of his litter mates…keep it simple. If we are tired during the day, shut off the electronics sooner at night and get more sleep…keep it simple. If we hate cleaning, don’t buy such a big house…keep it simple.

People will even complicate getting into heaven. There is only one way…Jesus…keep it simple!

I challenge you to keep it simple today. No excuses and no overthinking. Jesus kept things simple for us, so shouldn’t we learn to follow His example?

Therefore each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to your neighbor, for we are all members of one body. Ephesians 4:25

When we were out of electricity the other day, my dad decided to bring over the generator so we wouldn’t be out the modern conveniences for too long. For helpers, Dad got me (his favorite), the oldest grandson (the almost man), and the youngest grandson (Mr. Muscles…he’s been waiting for me to find a place for that in one of these writings). We unloaded the generator with my Dad guiding it off the truck and down the planks he had made. The oldest and I were to hold it back so it didn’t run him over. I’m not sure, but I think Mr. Muscles was taking the supervisory role. It went pretty smoothly if you don’t count the generator almost taking my dad down. I guess we weren’t holding it back quite enough. The giggles on my end may have had my dad rethinking his helpers for next time.

We got everything hooked up and ready to go. Of course we come to find out the electricity has already been restored and didn’t need the generator after all! It was time to unhook everything, load it back into the truck, and classify this as a dress rehearsal. Hmmm…I wonder what Dad would have changed to make it go smoother next time…could it have been the helpers…or more like one specific helper?

Now, all we needed to do was get the generator out of the landscaping and back into the truck. That doesn’t sound too hard, and it wasn’t. We did however, run into one tiny mishap. Going into the landscaping, the generator was taken around the shrub that was planted last year, but coming out it was taken over the shrub. Poor Dad figured he could just put that little shrub right between the wheels and it would go right over the top of it. He figured wrong. I was amused, and told him he decapitated my shrub! He walks over and says, “Hmm, thought I had enough clearance.” It’s in times like this that I get my best memories that make me smile! My dad’s butt print on my garbage can would be another one, but I’m getting off topic.

Now, you might think that was the end of the story…nope. I told the hubby about it, and it didn’t bother him at all either. He is used to my plants and trees coming to a catastrophic end. I’ll have to tell you more about that some other time. At this point, it wasn’t even ruined! What did surprise me was when I walked past that shrub later in the afternoon and it looked completely fine. Did the hubby actually take the top and put it back on? That might last for a day or two, but it wouldn’t fool anyone for long. We could pretend that everything was perfect; however that wasn’t really the truth.

I like seeing the real shrub because, although it may not be perfect, it was part of the events that shaped a memory of my dad coming to help his daughter. It represents love. Too often people try to cover up real life by wanting everything to seem perfect, but don’t let them fool you, no matter how badly someone wants to come across as having it all together, they don’t.

I feel like I need to clarify that having a mask of perfection on is different than being positive. Nobody wants to listen to a list of complaints. I’m a HUGE believer in our attitude determining our altitude-whoever said that was brilliant! What I’m talking about though, is putting on a fake mask to hide what we aren’t happy with. The person who does this might deceive themselves or others in the short term, but most people can tell what is genuine and what isn’t.

We all know that perfection isn’t possible, yet when we are on the receiving end of the “everything is perfect” attitude two things could happen. We roll our eyes because it is so outrageous or we allow it to undermine our confidence. We might say, “What am I doing so wrong?”

Do people wear these masks because they want to feel superior or see someone struggling? I don’t believe that’s the case. I believe it has to do with a lack of self-esteem in them and it has nothing at all to do with the person they’re talking to or they are trying to fool themselves. What these people don’t realize is that they are missing out on an opportunity.  They could be a sense of inspiration by being real with the problems they face. We can get inspired by seeing someone face a difficulty with hope of a good outcome.

 

If you doubt yourself because of dealing with what I’ve talked about, please say, “I’m glad for them, but real life isn’t perfect. There are going to be struggles to face, and I’m not the first or will I be the last to face them. I can face them with a positive attitude without pretending.”

Here are some truths that I can share with you:

• I make mistakes…often…but I can learn from them and can be forgiven.
• My kids are going to argue and act up, but that doesn’t mean I’m a bad mom, it means they have opportunities to grow.
• I feel like I don’t have what it takes sometimes, but this is when God can show His strength.
• My eyes are prone to be glazed over by the end of the school day, but that doesn’t mean I shouldn’t be homeschooling, it means I’m giving everything I have to give. It allows me to see my husband as a superhero that comes in and saves the day by allowing me to regroup.
• I don’t feel positive or at peace all the time, but that pushes me to listen harder for God to direct me.
• Practice makes progress, not perfection. “Practice makes progress” was in a devotion I read, and I hold that one close!

 

What if you are the one pretending? I have to tell you that I believe honesty is one of the most important characteristics that someone can have. I like to think I’m a very honest person, yet I’m being dealt with on this. I’ve been dealing with some crazy health stuff lately and I’m sooo over it, unfortunately my body didn’t get that memo. When asked how I’m feeling, I tend to do the “I’m fine” phrase. I was straight-up asked why I was lying. WHAT? Was I really asked that? Oh no they didn’t! After a deep breath, I was struck by how they were right. I wasn’t being honest. I don’t want to drag someone down, I don’t want someone to worry, and frankly, I want to speak positive things into my life. That is all great, but am I keeping things real? I should be saying, “Not perfect, but I’m getting there!”

 

Two things…we can’t let anyone take our self-confidence because they are full of hot air, and don’t put on a mask because it only makes us unrelatable.  Put off falsehoods and speak truthfully today!

Now the LORD God had formed out of the ground all the wild animals and all the birds in the sky. He brought them to the man to see what he would name them; and whatever the man called each living creature, that was its name. Genesis 2:19

Early morning is one of the best times of the day in the summer for walks. It’s a bit cooler, the animals seem to be on full display, and it’s the best way to prepare you for the day ahead. I love walking the pup while spending some time with God in the fresh air.

There are some days I thank God for the show He has put on for an audience of just one person. He goes all out those days…it’s in your face and you can’t miss it! It’s as if His booming voice is saying, “Here I am, you can’t deny that I’m making myself known!”

The best musical couldn’t compete with the performances I’ve seen. The music is amazing…the birds have the most beautiful voices. The costumes are unbelievable…the colors are so vivid! I’ve had pileated woodpeckers zipping across right in front of me, hawks soaring above, deer standing right in the middle of the road just waiting for me to approach, and the rabbits will sit there until I’m just a couple yards away. Then there are the butterflies…I reach out my hand, just sure that they are going to land on me. It’s as if the chipmunks are telling me to join in, not just watch, as they scamper all around. Those days are magical, leaving me feeling all warm inside.

There are other days that God is whispering on those walks. He is quietly saying, “You will find me, if only you look.” Those are the days that the birds are quietly sitting in the trees with barely a sound. The deer are there, but if I’m not searching the fields and woods, I wouldn’t have ever found them. They aren’t moving, just blending in and watching. The rabbits are off in the distance, and the butterflies are still there, but they are resting on a flower. I’ve almost walked right past a newt on the road because it’s so small, I would have missed it if I wasn’t aware of my surroundings.

It’s so much like what God does in our life on a daily basis. Sometimes He sure lets us know He’s right there with us. So much so, that we’re sure we can feel Him. Other days, He wants us to search Him out. Oh, He’s still there, but if we aren’t careful, we could miss what He wants us to see.

Today, look for God. Don’t wait until He’s in your face trying to get your attention. If you do, you’ll miss out on some awesome moments!

Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken. Ecclesiastes 4:12

Do you have a childhood memory where someone made you feel important and special during those awkward years? There are a couple times that really stick out to me that my uncle boosted my confidence. One thing he used to do was choose me to be his “copilot” when we would go on a trip. My job would be to look for signs, be in charge of the map, and generally be his extra set of eyes. Out of everyone in the vehicle he chose me…YES! I don’t know if he even remembers those times, or if he realized how that would shape my relationship with my children so many years later.

We were going through a time when life started getting in the way. You know what I mean…stuff started building up…the pressures from people outside the home, the stresses of school, all the running for the activities the kids were in. We started to forget how to communicate, we were snippy with each other, we weren’t connecting as much, and the worst thing was, we were growing apart. I’m stubborn and wouldn’t except that it was just the way life was. I wanted to stop the direction we were going…and fast!

It was time for an intervention. I called the hubby and asked what his work schedule looked like for the next week. He was surprised to find out that there wasn’t anything big going on. I told him to see if he could take off because I was packing and we were going away. What? He wasn’t sure if I was just saying that or if he should believe me. I’m the one who starts searching for places to go months in advance, who starts buying and packing way before we have to go, and who has a plan even if God may laugh at it. I told him I was serious, and he became excited. The boys were excited too. I let them know this wasn’t just a plain old vacation…this was a time to get back on track! Boy did they have some surprises ahead of them.

We booked a couple places to stay last minute and packed up that night. The first part was an adventure, somewhere we hadn’t gone before. We were going to watch a performance about Joseph from the Bible. I was sure there would be some things to learn about wisdom in there. Next, we were going to a place where we feel all the stress melting away. It was a place to enjoy the beach, fish, relax, and reconnect. It was a place where we dream about when life gets to be too much.

It was time for the first shock. No electronics! No radio, no TV, no internet (only small exceptions for work), and no phones were permitted. We had a week of all of us together without tons of distractions…just long car rides ahead of us and each other. Would this be great or would this be a total disaster?

The next morning we were up early and ready to hit the road. It was time for the next shock to the system. This one hit the hubby hard. I thought I might have to deal with a panic attack from him when I took the GPS, shut it off, and stowed it away. Remember the rule with electronics? What did I think I was doing? We HAD to have the GPS to get to our destination! Nope, we’ll be fine…I reminded him of that adventure we were going to have. After his breathing got back under control, I showed him the directions I had printed out. Then, I was really cruel. I took them away and handed them to the boys. Time to build confidence in these young men and teach them how to communicate with us, the drivers, in a way we could understand. It was time to teach the hubby and me how to listen to our copilots, the only ones with the directions. My uncle taught me a lesson that was going to get our family back on track!

It was an experience that we’ll always remember. The first few directions were a little rough to understand, but then we started communicating clearly with each other. The boys were nervous that they would mess up. I told them that if we got off course, it wasn’t the end of the world. We’ll just turn around and try it again. We were a team and finally working like one again!

We read the Live Original book by Sadie Robertson. It was just what we needed. We stopped reading more times than I could count in order to talk about life and what was important to us. It even rained quite a bit that week, but that only helped because it forced us to just be together. We enjoyed the time playing games together and just hanging out.

Sometimes we are so focused on being independent that we don’t allow anyone to be our copilot, but according to the Bible that makes us weak and more likely to break. It takes away an opportunity to build confidence and to make a memory that may affect another generation. It keeps us as separate strands instead of a strong cord. A cord of three strands…or in our case, four…is not quickly broken.

I challenge you to take strands and build a cord today. Start with something simple and watch communication improve and bonds strengthen! Who are you choosing for your copilot today?

Set a guard over my mouth, O Lord; keep watch over the door of my lips. Psalm 141:3

The heat and humidity has been hitting us hard lately. Of course that leads to rain and storms with the uncertainty of the power staying on. The electricity has been blinking for the past few days, but we haven’t lost power for more than a couple of minutes at a time.

The other night we had a power surge. After the hubby messed with the breaker, it was time to see if it affected any electronics.  We found out that it could have been worse.  It only got a few things, but among them was the Wi-Fi router.  It was fried!  We had to wait for a new one before I could post anything new.  I thought about posting it to my living room wall like Beatrice did in the Esurance commercial, but “That’s not how any of this works!”

It amazes me how something that happened in a blink of an eye can completely ruin something else!  It got me thinking about how quickly our relationships can get fried by surges of anger, just like our router did. One sharp word and our tongue can ruin a relationship that took years to build.

The boys did an experiment in Sunday School where they had to squeeze all the toothpaste out of the tube. They were given toothpicks to put it back in…not so easy. Just like our words.

We read about a boy having to hammer nails into a board each time his tongue got out of control. The child was able to start taking the nails out as he learned to control his words and anger. Success at last…all the nails were gone! However, there wasn’t a smooth board there anymore. It was filled with holes that damaged the board and didn’t go away.

Today, make sure your words are building people up. There is a saying “You Rise When Lifting Others” that we need to keep in the front of our thoughts. Don’t fry a relationship with a surge of anger, with thoughtless words, or abruptness. One word can cut off communication just like the loss of my router did, but the irreparable damage is done to something so much more precious…a relationship with a loved one.

Use your words for strengthening your relationships today.

There, in the presence of the Lord your God, you and your families shall eat and shall rejoice in everything you have put your hand to, because the Lord your God has blessed you. Deuteronomy 12:7

The 2016 Olympics are in full swing and the competitions are fierce. The boys are fascinated by all of it, but of course my warriors will make a competition out of just about anything. If you want a boy to excel, give them competition and some excitement. Noise and danger only add to the fun! This starts when they are very young. If you want a little one to eat their vegetables, tell them you’ll eat yours first. If you want toys picked up, set a timer and watch them go!

What about when they win?  These boys sure can celebrate! We were taking advantage of a program the rangers were having at Assateague National Seashore where we were learning about the environment by kayak. My youngest and husband were in one kayak, while my oldest was with me. We were talking with a ranger as we were heading back to the beach.   We couldn’t quite figure out what was going on when my hubby and son went flying past us on their kayak. The ranger started laughing and informed us that she thought they were trying to beat us. We were in a race and didn’t even know it! It didn’t matter to them that we weren’t even participating. They were having quite the celebration for their “win” back at the beach!

How often do we forget to celebrate our successes because we are already looking ahead to the next thing? How many times do we forget to rejoice with our spouses, our kids, our family, and our friends for their successes?

In the parable of the lost sheep in Luke 15:3-10, the shepherd found that lost sheep and didn’t just go about his work again. He called his friends and neighbors together telling them to rejoice with him. I think this is really important. It helps us mark and remember the good things God has done for us. It’s like a gratitude journal in action!

God has provided all that we have and all the talents He gave us. When we aren’t rejoicing for those things, it isn’t necessarily being humble. We are actually not showing our appreciation. We are simply not giving glory to God! Why do we act like Eeyore when we should be celebrating like Tigger would? We need to rejoice in the small things as well as the big!

Whether you’re winning a gold medal at the Olympics or celebrating a competition that only you know about, the way you celebrate is your choice. Will you celebrate your gratitude? Will you make someone’s day by joining them in rejoicing? Are you going to be Eeyore or Tigger today? It’s up to you!

Fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Hebrews 12:2

The boys have been saving up to get new sights for their bows. They have been going on a few shoots and doing pretty well, but they feel like they could be doing better if they had these new sights. They finally got them last week and have been working on getting them adjusted just right.

Now, I’m thinking that they just need to practice more because it is the person behind the bow, not the accessories on the bow that hits the target. Just saying…I know that even if I got the best running shoes out there, I still wouldn’t be running any marathons. However, there are times when wisdom needs to prevail and you should just keep your thoughts to yourself. Those with bows and arrows find their accessories very important.

Sooo…they are out there shooting and adjusting, shooting and adjusting. They started to increase the yardage they were shooting and they were getting bullseyes! It was working! What a difference it makes to know exactly where your target is and where to aim. It was great listening to the excited whoops and to see the ear-to-ear smiles. Boy I’m glad I held my tongue because those sights did help.

I learned two things:

• Wisdom on when to keep your comments to yourself is important.
• When you see your target clearer, you get the bullseye.

Unless you have a clear sight as to where you’re aiming, you tend to be off the mark. How can we make sure we see things clearly? Fixing our eyes on Jesus!

If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. 1 John 1:9

As far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us. Psalm 103:12

Today was a successfully challenging day at school. We homeschool and that can lead to short fuses when it comes to “mom” making a student do something they don’t necessarily want to instead of “teacher”. The safety of home allows for creativity and willingness to express opinions without ridicule, but on the flip side there can be the occasional slip of being mouthy that my boys wouldn’t do in a classroom outside the home.

The good thing about homeschooling is that the whole family sees and celebrates successes as a team. The bad thing is the whole family sees and is affected by poor attitude. The negative isn’t something that happens daily, but it certainly needs to be expected and addressed.

When a mistake is made within the family, we apologize. This is important to us as much as forgiving is. When my son said he was sorry for being disrespectful and having a bad attitude, the problem was taken care of in my mind…time to move forward. A short time later I wanted to cry hearing the worry as he looks at me and says, “Do you forgive me?” I had already forgiven him, but he needed reassured. When I heard the uncertainty and sincerity in his voice, I could have scooped him up and showered him with hugs and kisses to make him feel all was better. As a growing boy I knew that wouldn’t be appreciated! I did the next best thing…I tried to help him understand that it was over and that he doesn’t need to worry about it. We just learn from our mistakes and try harder next time.

It was such a successful day because it opened my eyes to something…something important…something big. I’m that child who seeks reassurance that I’ve been forgiven. As a parent, the Lord is feeling the pain when I don’t realize He forgave me the first time I asked. I might see it as a matter of not deserving forgiveness, but I might as well say, “I can forgive my children easily, but God can’t!” What!? That is horrible, yet it is exactly what happens. I don’t think I’m alone in this either. I believe we hurt Him when we have to ask over and over just like we hurt when our children are carrying around that heavy burden of guilt.

I challenge you not to carry around guilt for something that has been forgiven.  Learn from your mistakes and do better next time.

But Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed. Luke 5:16

I groaned as I saw the dishes after the dishwasher ran because there was a soap film left on them. I cringed. Over the past several weeks the dial would get stuck and a monster would make groaning noises from inside. The hubby said to leave it alone and he’d check it out when he got home. I started picturing him having the insides in his hands while looking at me and saying that it was “no big deal”. It was a nightmare waiting to happen…maybe the monster would get him while he was trying to fix the problem.

Everything goes at once when you buy appliances all at the same time. I asked myself if this was the start of the shopping spree we’d need to go on. I hoped not! It turned out to be nothing that the hubby couldn’t handle with the help of a YouTube video. There was some build-up that needed cleaned out and some plastic that must have been blocking the drain. It was good to go!

Before the dishwasher was fixed, it could run and run, but not accomplish much of anything. There are times when my life gets like that dishwasher.   I can run and run, but not accomplish much of anything except frustration and exhaustion. Why? It wasn’t God’s plan for us to be on the go from early morning until late at night, day after day. When do we let God work on us and clear out the build-up? We need to have that time just as Jesus did to get to a quiet place and pray. It will not show weakness, it will give strength.

Today, let God make you like new again…He doesn’t even need a YouTube video!

So be careful to do what the Lord your God has commanded you; do not turn aside to the right or to the left. Deuteronomy 5:32

I had our bouncy pup at a training class where he learns the basics of agility. This is supposed to help him with paying attention to me and make our bond stronger. It also teaches me better communication with him. A short sequence of a tunnel and three jumps was set up waiting to go. One at a time we were to take off the leash and have them complete the sequence. Hmmm, this was going to be some kind of interesting.

It came time for us to do the exercise. Now let me remind you…off leash…9 month pup…all kinds of distractions…here we go! The leash comes off…he’s waiting…nice. He goes through the tunnel, does a small turn, and over the first jump…he’s listening! Before he gets turned to do the next jump he spots a person. Oh my, how exciting (his brain is working and the thoughts are just flying around) a person, a person put on this earth…in my path…to make me happy, happy, oh so happy!

Now you might be thinking that we were done for at this point. Game over. You are right in one way because he did start to go to that person for what I’m sure he felt was going to be the most exciting pat he ever got. Little did he know that if he got to her, it wouldn’t have been as much fun as he thought. He would have pretty much been ignored until I got him. No rewards for bad behavior! What happened next surprised me. I yelled is name, and he did a complete about face, listening to see what I would say next. I gave him the commands for the next obstacles and he was right back on course again…yes! He finished and got his reward. I was so impressed!

Doesn’t this sound like our lives? We are in God’s will, running our race, when all of a sudden there is a temptation ahead. If we start to veer off course, will we turn back around at our Master’s voice? We can’t let temptations get in the way of getting the rewards that God has in store for us.

I challenge you to stay tuned into His voice today. Be careful not to turn aside to the right or to the left of God’s course.